The other day, Hayes (3yrs) wanted to help with the dishes. !!!!!!!!! Amazing, right?! I was thrilled at the opportunity to engage him in being helpful around the house.
As I showed him a cup, I said, “Cups go on top; right here. See?” I grabbed another cup, intending to hand it to him to place in the top rack…but he was already busy, exclaiming, “No, cups go on the bottom!” and his little hands were hard at work, taking cups from their [correct] place and putting them on the bottom.
Did I mention they were also right-side up? ::cue palm to forehead::
Initially, I tried repeating that they go on top. That didn’t work, because he just followed that up with *his* rule for cups. One after another, all of the cups were on the bottom rack.
I had a choice. As I watched this fantastic little human help with a chore, I realized that I could undo his hard work and reinforce where I deemed the appropriate place for cups…or I could relish in the chance to connect with him and recognize his awesome interest in being a contributing member of the household. The important question was, what’s more important?
The cups remained on the bottom rack.
In her book, Bringing Yoga to Life, Donna Farhi says, “As we sift through our life experience we may notice that we consistently allow the urgent to override the important” (p.15). After reading her words, I have become more aware of how often I let this happen. Later, as I listened to Mara read a book, I caught myself with the urge to tell her to turn the page as she savored the illustrations. I held my tongue and watched her giggle as her understanding of the text deepened. I’m so grateful for the pause between thought and action, as it allowed her the freedom to enjoy reading instead of feeling like it was just something to check off the list for the day.
Being a student of yoga affords me the space to reflect on how I experience this life I’ve been given. In taking a moment to realize what’s important, I’m able to live in a way that is more consistent with my values. Rather than simply moving through my days, I can authentically connect with myself and my kiddos (and everyone else around me, really). Whenever you have the chance, choose what’s important. Even if it takes longer. Even if a shortcut is easier. Especially when your choice strengthens the relationship you have with those around you.
Love. Always.
Linds
